Feed Me, Seymour

Gotta stay honest!

Daily Food Tracker: Friday
Breakfast (late, at my desk): fatfree yogurt
Snack: none (the pineapple sat forlornly looking at me all day)
Lunch: two slices pepperoni pizza
Dinner: Hunh. I honestly do not remember. Oh, right! A large mixed greens salad and cheesy garlic bread from D'Agostino's.

Daily Food Tracker: Saturday
Breakfast: out to breakfast with J and Hubby: Belgian waffle with maple syrup and fresh strawberries
Lunch: (at a birthday party for a one-year-old): Doritos, macaroni salad, 2 Laughing Cow wedges with crackers, canteloupe, ham and corned beef sandwich with muffaletta topping on a flat sandwich roll, deviled eggs, a metric ton of water
Snack 1 (at the party): BIRTHDAY CAKE!!!
Snack 2 (after the party): couple of gin and tonics and onion rings :)
Dinner: spinach and onion thin-crust pizza

Daily Food Tracker: Sunday
Breakfast: whole wheat waffle with crunchy peanut butter
Second breakfast: lemon fatfree yogurt and pineapple chunks
Lunch: Hawaiian burger (pineapple, jack cheese, bacon and BBQ) and half an order of cheese fries at Meatheads
Snack: toffee crunch ice cream bar and a metric ton of water (it is ridiculously hot out today)
Dinner: sweet Italian chicken sausage on a bun, bowl of chopped veggies in dressing
Snack: oh, the lure of fresh rice krispie treats

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So that was my first full week of tracking food on the blog, and I have to admit I liked it. I've done WW and Medifast online in the past, and I'd forgotten what a good habit it is to not only write down what you eat but to do so in a public forum. It definitely keeps me honest, and it definitely makes me think about what I am eating throughout the day. I made a much more concerted effort to eat better in my other meals if one of them was awful, and I want to continue doing that while also getting my "bad" meals not to be so bad.

The weather is supposed to be heat-wave hot all week, which makes the idea of cooking anything upsetting. So before it got crazy hot on Sunday morning, I hit the grocery store and then spent some time prepping things for easy "putting together" during the week.  My husband is going to visit his mom for a long weekend starting Thursday so I will be on my own after that. (Sliced figs with blue cheese and bacon, you will be mine!) I tried to buy items I can pull together quickly into some kind of meal, be it a salad or sandwich or just a bunch of random foods on the plate. With him gone, I can eat more piecemeal and with less takeout. I hope. :)



For salads

Cucumber, red and yellow peppers, carrot shreds, leeks, celery. Throw a couple of handfuls onto some romaine, add blue cheese and dressing, and my salad is done!


I love strawberries and will buy them as deep into the season as I can. Good for fast breakfasts with yogurt, or just an evening snack. Ooooh, or I can recreate my delicious Saturday morning Belgian waffle and strawberries at home with my regular breakfast whole-wheat waffle...


Watermelon, the summer's most perfect fruit. I am allergic to stone fruits, so peaches, plums, pears, and apples all have to bypass my plate. But you will take my melons and berries away from me when I am dead.


I fried up the last of the peppered turkey bacon.


Another perfect addition to my salads this week. It was so, so good in last week's salad.


Because I am not made of stone, I made a batch of rice krispie treats too. I had to finish off the box of cereal before it went bad! That's my excuse and I am sticking with it. (It will probably go to the office unless my husband polishes them off before Tuesday.)

I also have:
leftover sweet Italian chicken sausage chopped and ready to go (boy that had some good flavor)
crab meat
eggs
grilled and cooled asparagus
more watermelon :)
good variety of yogurts

If it gets cooler, I want to make a sausage (or crab), asparagus and sharp cheddar frittata with scallions. My friend gave me a great versatile recipe for it a couple of years ago; you can cut it up into 6 slices and wrap them individually. Reheat in the morning and you have breakfast to go!

Frittata from Barbara D.

1/2 lb. turkey bacon, cooked crisp and chopped (1" pieces or so)
2 large scallions, chopped
8 oz. (or so) mushrooms (I usually use crimini, and really, white buttons would do as well, but the shiitakes looked good this week. Though they tend to be drier than the criminis, so the frittata is a little dry -- but you can't beat the taste of shiitakes, so.)
12 oz. mozzarella, shredded
6 eggs, beaten with salt, pepper and a couple tablespoons water
1 C. or so freshly grated mix of Parmesan and Asiago

Add the bacon, vegetables and mozzarella to the eggs and mix together -- I use my hands to get everything thoroughly incorporated. Pour into a well Pam-sprayed round glass baking dish (a square one works, but tends to make for drier, more well-done corners). The one I use is 8 1/2" in diameter and 3" deep. The frittata will puff quite a bit when cooking, then will settle as it cools.
Bake at 350 for 20 min, then add the grated cheese to the top and cook 20 min more. Let cool completely and cut into 6 wedges. Wrap each individually in plastic wrap and yes! They will keep 6 days. I usually make this on Sunday and I have it for breakfast all the way to Saturday. Just heat it for a minute in the microwave before eating.

You can put *anything* in this recipe -- everyone I've given it to has modified it. My brother uses vegetarian sausage and spinach, an Indian friend jazzes it up with Indian spices. You can use just about any vegetable, obviously.
To make it more WW friendly, You can use egg beaters (my mom does) and decrease the cheese (or use low fat), I'm sure. I wouldn't use non-fat cheese though -- none of the ones I've tried melt at all and that's sort of critical.
(My notes: she is not kidding about put anything into it; as long as you pick a veggie, a cheese, a meat and an onion type, you are good to go!)

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I feel pretty certain you can expect a good number of food posts and photos this week. Hope you don't mind!

Best Laid Plans

I forgot to take any photos of my outfits this weekend (just shorts and tops in 90-degree heat) so the food discussion will continue on from Sunday's post.

Daily Food Tracker: Sunday

Breakfast: whole wheat waffle, crunchy peanut butter, watermelon and pineapple, black coffee with Sweet'n'Low
Lunch: french onion soup (not with that awful grilled cheese thing baked on top, just the soup with a small crouton and some parmesan cheese), half a roll, egg salad sandwich, vinegar based coleslaw, water
Dinner: reuben burger and cheese fries at Meatheads, Sprite
Snack: 2 WW English toffee bars (night)

I was doing okay, even had mental plans to have a big salad with peppered turkey bacon crumbled on top for dinner, than got too hungry before dinner and immediately talked myself into a trip to Meatheads with a girlfriend. The funny thing is, my husband and I hit the farmer's market in the morning and stocked up, then I cut up all the veggies for salad so they would be ready. And I walked away from all of it anyway.

But now we have orange cauliflower (carro-flower, they called it), thin asparagus, and sweet Italian chicken sausage for grilling for dinner tonight, at least. Plus I still have all the fixings for my peppered bacon salad (dang, doesn't that sound good?). I also came up with the idea to make a pot of whole wheat couscous tonight so we will have it for the week; I need some carbs with dinner, even just some couscous, or to me dinner doesn't feel finished and I end up eating too much bread and pub cheese.

In inspiration news, the NY Times re-published Mark Bittman's 101 Simple Salads for the Season, which I just love. Bittman has become my favorite food inspiration over the last couple of years. I have his How To Cook Everything cookbook, which is amazing in its clarity and ambition, and I picked up his Food Matters book this winter, which is a great manifesto for eating healthy in our modern agricultural times. I can't say I can embrace his ideas completely -- I love my meat waaaaay too much for that -- but I'm going to thumb through it again this week to see what other transferable ideas he has. And I am going to print out that salad list; lettuce-based salads get old very quickly. His are more like meals in a bowl.

So what did you eat yesterday?

30 DoC: Day 30

We reach the end of the 30 Days of Creativity, and I finally, FINALLY do something creative with food.



I bought a veggie tray for our 4th of July cookout last Sunday, and there was plenty left over at the end of the night. As I was putting everything away, it dawned on me that even though my husband and I don't particularly care for raw veggies, we sure like them cooked -- and everything on the tray would be perfect for grilling. (Also, it was all hardy vegetables that would last a week: broccoli, cauliflower, bell peppers, baby carrots.)

So last night I picked up a bison New York strip steak and some basil-pesto shrimp kebobs from Whole Foods, and we grilled everything up.





We did the veggies in a foil packet with olive oil, fajita seasonings, and some water so it would steam, and cooked those for about 40 minutes. There was so much I thought for sure it would last a couple of days, but Hubby polished them off in two heaping plates. Heh.



Delicious.

I've been trying to "eat better" without actually following a strict diet; I know I need to lose weight, I want to eat healthier, and I want it to be for the long haul. But there is something about my brain thinking "I am on a diet" that makes it feel short-term, and I end up starting and stopping until I give up and eat junk all day long. That's not what I want.

On the other hand, I am not so sure I am really "eating better" as much as I think I am. Along with the delicious, healthy dinner above, I also had 2 gin and tonics and 3 slices of seeded bread liberally smeared with pub cheese. Three slices! Plus two WW English toffee ice cream bars that night. Hrm.

Tina over at T Minus, T Plus does an interesting thing where she shows photos and WW points of all the foods she eats in a day. While I don't plan on taking pictures of everything, I am going to challenge myself for the next week to document ALL the food I eat throughout the day. I know from many years of WW that tracking food is the best way to keep yourself honest, and I haven't been honest with myself in a while. That IS what I want.

So one personal challenge has ended, and another begins. For the next week, look for My Daily Food Tracker to appear at the bottom of my posts; I will post one day behind, so today's food will appear in tomorrow's post. Anyone else willing to do it with me? If you don't want to do it in your own blog, you can just enter your food into the comments here. Whaddya say?

30 in 30 Challenge: The Items

As I have mentioned, I am participating in Kendi's 30-in-30 Challenge starting on Monday. The rules are simple: pick 30 items in your closet and wear them for the next 30 days. Shoes are included, accessories and coats are not. Also, there is no shopping during these 30 days.

The timing of the challenge is actually perfect for me; I'm at a weight where only a limited number of items fit me anyway, and I am about to start Medifast on Monday as well. Restricting my diet and my closet -- and my SHOPPING!! -- at the same time may seem crazy, but I think it's probably the best thing for me. I am extremely stressed at work right now, and when I feel boxed in like this I tend to overindulge on giving myself "treats". I shop too much, I drink too much, I eat too much -- and I don't need to be doing any of those things right now. A little structure and rigidity will do me a world of good; if I can't blow off steam wandering through the mall or ordering fattening food, I will channel that energy back into work or even preparing for the holidays (which are also looming with lots of shopping and tasks to do), or maybe even picking up some exercise again (Wii, I am looking at you!).

And if I really need to indulge in a vice, there's always the casino. *g* I love me some slots!

I have two disclaimers:

1. I am allowing myself to "swap out" pants if I actually lose enough that any of them become too loose (I have others in smaller sizes in my closet), but in a month that seems unlikely. Everything else will definitely still fit in 30 days.

2. I have a new pair of black shoes for my shorter pants on their way, and when they arrive, I will be swapping out the metallic AK loafers for them. I put the loafers in as a placeholder in case the shoes don't work with my shorter pants, but I am going to try to put off wearing the loafers until the new ones get here if I can.

So these are my 30 items.

Shoes: 3 pairs. (This is the part that worries me the most. Wish me luck!)



Here are the Pikilinos I hope to be replacing the loafers with.



Layering tops: 6.



Woven tops: 5.



Chunky jacket/sweaters: 5



Cardigans: 4



Pants/Jeans: 7 (3 skinnies, 3 bootcuts, 1 jeans. Color breakdown: 2 black, 1 brown, 1 navy, 1 grey, 1 grey/black check, 1 denim.)



I have to admit, laying them out like this makes me nervous. What if I need a different layering top? Why didn't I include any camisoles? Or boots?! Am I going to regret not including one of my two dresses?

But that's what a challenge is for -- to challenge myself. So even though it is a restrictive amount of clothes, it will actually push me to be more creative with my combinations -- or I will just wear the same thing over and over again for a month. Either way, I am in it for the next 30 days! Hope you stick around and see how I do :)

Ooooooh, look at the list of bloggers participating! Holy smokes, that is a lot of people.

13-in-13 Challenge: Week 1 complete

I don't really follow football. I understand the basic rules of the game, but I don't follow any teams or know how long a whole season lasts or spend my Sundays watching games with friends. That said, I adore Friday Night Lights. It's a terrific, nuanced, beautifully-acted show about the complicated lives of a town who lives and dies by their high-school football team. I can't wait for it to start again on NBC this January (don't have DirectTV).

Anyway, on FNL they occasionally have a "bye" week, when they don't have a game that Friday and they spend the week taking it a little easier and recharging their batteries for the game the following week.

I think I should have had a bye week between my (self-imposed!) challenges.

I wasn't super-horrible, going on some crazy binge ordering pizza** and eating pints of ice cream or anything close to that. I just didn't TRY to do any of the 4 goals I set. I didn't even feel guilty for not trying. By about Thursday I started asking myself what I was doing and why, and the best I could come up with was that I just didn't feel like it this week. That's when the "bye week" phrase popped into my head, and I realized what I had done.

Well, I wish I had tried more, but hopefully my total procrastination -- and that I have to confess said procrastination publicly right here and now -- will spur me on to getting it right this week. I am so tired of not fitting in all my cute dresses!

For posterity's sake, here is the review of my goals.

1. LOSE WEIGHT.
Weight: 180.2
GAIN: 1.2

Dang. DAAAAAAAANG.

2. Eat one vegetable-based meal a day.
This was the one thing that I did most consistently; I think there were only 2 days out of 7 where I did not have at least one veggie-based meal per day.


3. Do at least 2 different types of exercise each week.
Oh, hahahahaha! Heeheeheehee! Oh, I crack myself up with my grand plans!
But my new running shoes arrive this week, and I truly am looking forward to getting to use them again. I miss running a lot.


4. Limit my sweets/dessert/treats to 3-4 per week.
I think I was acting like this week was a farewell tour to cookies; I ate some of all of my favorites! And Thursday we had our division holiday luncheon, and there were sugar cookies galore. I love Christmas sugar cookies, the shaped ones with sprinkles, and especially the colored ones you make with the form-shooter thing. It was four hours of listening to people drone on and on about project plans, and platters of sparkly sugar cookies in front of me. Guess how I chose to keep myself awake?

There are 2 more parties this week; I won't be falling into the same trap. But I will save up my treat days for those, so I can have something delicious at each.


**Hubby and I made a promise earlier this fall that we were going to not order pizza for the rest of the year, in a reverse New Year's resolution. This was a huge shift for us; pizza is our default "I'm too lazy to do anything, we deserve a treat" meal, and we often order it once a week. We've stuck to our vow, though, and it's actually getting easier over time. We've come up with quick meals to replace it at home, and now when we want a treat we go out to a nice dinner. Even there at that "treat" moment, I am getting better about making smarter choices. We also often select Sweet Tomatoes as our "treat" restaurant, and we pile on the salad fixin's.

I am looking forward to a nice thin-crust pizza with onions, spinach and sausage on New Year's Eve, I will admit, but I think after that I'm going back to the No-Pizza Promise. It's really been a great help in not careening completely out of control.

16-Week Commitment Challenge: COMPLETE

Hard to believe the 16 weeks is finally over! In some ways, it took forever, and in others it flew by. Strange to look back and see that 16 weeks ago was AUGUST; I thought it was at least the fall when I started it. But no!

Instead of doing a weekly recap, I thought I would look at my success at each goal overall. Looking at the big picture has helped me think about what I want to focus on next, what I've managed to build into a habit and what still needs work.

1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any.
This was the primary goal I wanted to accomplish, and I succeeded 100%. Attending weekly meetings is now a regular habit, one I will continue through 2010 at least. I prefer the Thursday leader but I like the convenience of a Saturday meeting better, so if I don't make one I definitely do the other.

For those of you new to the blog, I actually am a former WW Leader. It's a program I love and wholeheartedly believe in. It's not for everyone, but the weekly meeting format is where I thrive. I needed to get back into it, to get over my embarrassment of paying while being Lifetime, of continuing to gain and still attend meetings. It's not just when you are successful that you need to go to a meeting; it's every week. That finally sunk in during these 16 weeks.

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum.
My success here was much more sporadic. I tried mixing it up, doing running and Wii yoga and stretching, working the Couch-to-5K plan and running a 5K, picking specific days for exercise, etc, but I still could not quite get to a regular routine. I will continue to concentrate on getting this into a habit, because I know regular exercise is so good for my health and for continued weight loss.

3. Count my points in my Tracker.
This took some time to get going, but I have been regularly journaling all my foods in my Tracker for the last 7 weeks. I don't count points but I do write (most) of it down now. Weekends are my weakest still; the Tracker stays tucked away in my purse with the rest of my work papers, unfortunately. I will keep plugging away at this too.

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week.
This was pretty easy, for the most part. We do end up drinking more during the holiday so I will stay more aware of it, but right now my biggest empty-calorie indulgence is cookies.


Overall, I think I did pretty well sticking to my goals. The problem, though, was despite all that focus, I did not lose any weight. In fact, I ended up gaining 11 pounds over the last 16 weeks.

Oops.

So my next challenge will address that. This one will range from today through to my birthday, March 13. Ironically, that is 13 weeks away. Yay, my lucky number! And even more ironically, I want to lose at least 13 pounds by then; that will put me at 166, which is a good middle point to decide what my final goal number will be.

I'm calling it the 13-in-13 Challenge. All the regular things will still be in place: I will be following the WW plan, attending weekly meetings, and exercising. But it's not enough to randomly pick a goal weight to aim for; I need smaller goals to achieve every week that will help me get to the larger goal. These are the ones I am doing for the next 13 weeks:

1. LOSE WEIGHT.
It seems so obvious a goal, but since it didn't happen the last challenge I am going to spell it out here. I will record my loss every week (or my gain, SIGH) instead of glancing once ay my book after weigh-in and not thinking about it again until the next weigh-in.

2. Eat one vegetable-based meal a day.
This means salads, veggie soups, my beloved spaghetti squash and tomato sauce, etc. If I have salad for lunch, then I can have a meat-based meal for dinner (steeak, meatloaf, etc). If I have a sandwich or hot entree at lunch, then dinner will be a salad or soup or spaghetti squash.
I have learned from journaling that the days I do best at staying on-track are days I do one veggie-based meal. So now I am going to do so consciously.

3. Do at least 2 different types of exercise each week.
Instead of focusing on the quantity of exercise, I am going to focus on the type. I have my punchcard for lap sessions at the park district pool, I have at least 2 types of Wii exercises I can alternate, and I will be ordering new running shoes this week so I can pick that back up. Maybe by keeping it changed up I will do it more often, and get into that habit I want so much to have.

4. Limit my sweets/dessert/treats to 3-4 per week.
I have to stop having a cookie a day, but cold turkey will only result in disaster. So I'll try moderation. I hear it's all the rage. :)

So there you have it. Ready, set, get to goal!

16-Week Commitment Challenge: Week 8 complete

Wow, the responses to my photo transformation post were just overwhelming. Thank you all so much for the kind words and encouragement! I skim through my photos all the time in my iPhoto program, but really seeing them all together like that reminds me how far I really have come -- and weirdly enough, how easy it would be to slip back to that. This isn't the first time I've lost a significant amount of weight, but I am determined -- even more so now -- that it will be the last.

And so, it's time to look at my progress on the commitment challenge.

1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any.
I was out of town this weekend, so I made sure to attend the Thursday night meeting instead. I even weighed in, which of course showed me the gain of my poor eating and the evening weigh-in. I am really hoping this is the peak of my re-gain; I hit a number I am NOT okay with, and that combined with my clothes not fitting right anymore, is the tipping point for me. Even though I was driving 16 hours or at a casino all weekend, I managed to lose some weight. Enough is enough!

Also, I really liked this leader on Thursday, more so than the Saturday one. The timing of the meeting isn't great, but I think I will try to attend it again this week. I might switch days altogether in the end; a good leader is too valuable an asset to WW to pass by. I've had my share of both; I know!

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum.
My specific-day commitment worked; I got in 3 days of running on Sunday, Tuesday and Saturday. I did miss getting it done on Friday as I said I would, but instead I ran all around the casino parking lot on Saturday morning. Which was CRAZY because it was frosty cold and I did not even have a sweatshirt, but made me feel super-virtuous. I ran by at least 3 people sleeping in their cars at 7:30 in the morning!

This week I am changing my set days, but I will get 3 in for sure. I also want to add at least 1 day of yoga. My waist will thank me later!

3. Count my points in my Tracker.
No, but I didn't try. I did make sure I got some fruits and veggies in at the casino, and I had good lunches all week.

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week.
I did mention I was at a casino all weekend, didn't I? Nuff said. :)

++++++++

No pictures of this weekend's outfits, but they were plenty cute. You will just have to trust me on that. :)

16-Week Commitment Challenge: Week 7 complete

This was definitely my worst week yet.

1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any.
Done.

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum.
I ran the 5K on Sunday, and then I did absolutely nothing all week. Ugh! Why do I do that to myself?

So I committed to a MF buddy that I would commit to 3 days a week running for the next month, and further I would do it on set days of the week: Sunday, Tuesday and Friday. Both the commitment and the set days were a good idea, as I wanted to blow off running all day today but knew that I could not. So I got it done, hurray!

3. Count my points in my Tracker.
Hahaha. No.

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week.
Hahahahahaha! Oh, goodness, no.

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I don't know why or how I fell so completely off the rails, especially since last Sunday I was feeling like I was starting to turn things around. But I felt and was out of control all week. I am just lucky it didn't impact my weight worse.

This week will be a challenge as I will be driving a lot next weekend and eating out on a trip away with my mother-in-law. I've set it up so small, easy meals will be available at home before I go, and I will stick with my running commitment. And I read that the hotel has a really cool pool so I will be checking that out, for sure!

16-Week Commitment Challenge: Week 5 complete

Well, this was not a good week on any of my goals, but I still need to do my weekly assessment!

1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any.
This is a regular habit now, thank goodness. I'm even beginning to recognize the regulars.

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum.
Um. I must be freaking out in some contrary, subconscious way about signing up for the 5K next Sunday, because I exercised exactly ZERO times this week! What the heck?

I'm not going to make any grand pronouncements about it, I am just going to get it done. I will be competing in the 5K no matter if I finish the C25K plan or not.

3. Count my points in my Tracker.
Nope.

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week.
Nope. The worst is that I end up having drinks and tons of salty food on Fridays, which bloats me up in time for my weigh-in the next morning.

I guess it's time to evaluate why I am self-sabotaging. This is not good. I'll work on it.

16-Week Commitment Challenge: Week 4 complete

Another week down! I am really glad that I've committed a 16-week stretch; knowing there's a long-range goal is helpful in accepting small victories or defeats. I'm easing myself out of the 'fast results' mindset of Medifast, and instead starting to aim for the horizon.

In other words, losing a little over a pound this week felt as great as it did when I lost 3 on a MF week. :)

Let's recap the 4 goals:

1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any.
Almost missed it because I was running late, but I made myself sit down and enjoy the meeting anyway. I also picked up a new cookbook called "Now and Later", which is two different meals from the same base ingredients. I could use those kinds of ideas!

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum.
I got 3 "real" exercise sessions in, and then did hours of yardwork on Saturday. which I am counting as exercise since my muscles are sore today. :)

But the true victories here were two: I dusted off the Wii Fit and started doing morning yoga sessions again (which will be great at firming up my core and waist, which has gotten flabby again), and I signed up for a 5K on September 27th. So I definitely have to complete the last 5 days of C25K before then! LOL.

3. Count my points in my Tracker.
Didn't do this at all. Ill try again this week. I need the honest accountability.

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week.
A couple of pear martinis at dinner last night, and that was it.

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I think it's time to drill down and concentrate on better eating. I do well with menu planning, so I'm going to try that this week. I've got today wide open, so there will be fridge cleaning and shopping and maybe a little food prep.

But first, there will be some outfit photos. I've been buying some new dresses and I think some are too similar to ones I already have. So it's time for a deathmatch! Stay tuned for details... ;-D

16-Week Commitment Challenge: Week 3 complete

We'll be out charter fishing on Lake Michigan tomorrow morning, then throwing a small barbecue for our fellow fishermen, so I wanted to post my stats today.

I actually had a very good week, and then completely fell apart on Friday. I ate too much sodium, didn't get my exercise in, had some beers with dinner, and then totally bloated up with water just in time for my Saturday morning meeting. SIGH. I gained back all the weight I'd been steadily losing all week, and even gained some more. I know it's just water weight and PMS, but still. It's disheartening to stumble at the finish line. It'll be a better race next week!

How did I do on my weekly goals?

1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any.
I went, and had every intention of using the no-weigh-in pass because I knew I was going to be mad to see a + sign when I should have had a - on the page. But right as I was paying, I changed my mind and recorded my weight. I don't know why I can't use those free passes, but I can't. It feels like a cop-out. So I acknowedged the gain, and I know it will be gone by next week. Heck, it'll be gone by tomorrow!

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum.
Another 2-day week. I'm going to work on getting in some time for that mid-week.

3. Count my points in my Tracker.
This is where I excelled this week! I started journaling my food, which kept me honest and on track. I didn't count the points, but I will soon.

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week.
The 3 beers on Friday did me in, but otherwise this was good.

+++++

In shopping news, I finally found some killer straight-leg jeans! And they were on sale! Martin + Osa is discontinuing their straight-legs for a slim fit, but I tried on the straight-legs and loved them. Scooped up a pair of longs and regular; I also got some whites, but I've reconsidered and will be returning them (and a salmon-y satin dress) as soon as I can. But the dark wash jeans are keepers! Oh, and I also found a pair of Levi's at Kohl's -- dark wash, straight legs, sold.

Each pair was $35 -- not a bad price, I'd say.

16-Week Commitment Challenge: Week 2 complete

Time to recap Week 2's results!


1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any.
Done, but only because I had made this commitment; I had a terrible week and knew I had a significant gain. I was trying to barter with myself, come up with reasons not to go, but as I said at the meeting, I knew after announcing the prior week that I was going to come for 16 weeks I couldn't bail out on week 2, for cryin' out loud! LOL.

So I sucked it up and went. That's why those meetings are important; they force to face reality, good or bad, and when you've gotten off-track that weekly accountability helps get you back on it. And going yesterday has gotten me to recommit.

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum.
Great googly-moogly, did I fail at this; I only got two days in, Monday and Saturday. I could blame the rainy weather and the fact that both the indoor track and the pool was closed for maintenance, but if I had really wanted to exercise I could have figured something out. Like, say, my Wii sitting right in front of my couch.

3. Count my points in my Tracker.
Not yet. I did download an app for this for my iPhone. I should try to use it. Maybe.

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week.
Eh, I think this was okay; the problem was the other thing Hubby and I do when we are lazy and tired from work and stressed out. We ate out too many times. Need to get a grip on that this week. We have easy-to-cook food in the house; we just need to open the fridge and eat it.

The other commitment I made at my WW meeting was to eat fruit 2 times a day. I can get in my veggies no problem, but when I am grabbing snacks -- particularly on the days when I am traveling to meetings for work instead of being in the office -- I have been grabbing the last of the MF bars or a small weighed-out bag of dried cranberries and peanuts. It's perfectly within plan, but it's not the healthiest choices. Then, because I feel like I've been eating "junk" throughout the day, I am more inclined to make poor choices for dinner. I need to stop that cycle, and to break the mental connection that granola bars or MF bars are acceptable alternatives to real food. They're not; they're processed snack foods with snack-y flavors. They are not meals.

But after 6 months on MF where I ate bars all day long, it's a tough habit to break. I will work on it!

Lastly, I need to remember this: part of why I am wearing dresses all the time now is that I don't want to admit that my size 10 pants don't fit anymore. I need to own up to that ASAP. This isn't a matter of just trying to lose the last bit of weight anymore; I am GAINING IT BACK. That is unacceptable.

My pants don't fit. I couldn't buy any of the beautiful new modern-style pants at Ann Taylor yesterday because I didn't fit into the size 10s. My pants don't fit, my pants don't fit, my pants don't fit.

If I say it long enough and loud enough, then hopefully it will drown out my pizza voice, right?

16-Week Commitment Challenge: Week 1 complete

So I completed Week 1 of my 16-week challenge. How did I do?

1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any.
Done, and it was great! This week's topic was about mental plateaus, and I realize I have essentially been on one since I switched plans. Got some good tips for getting myself in gear again.

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum.
Hrm. Only got in 3 days this week; I fell apart mid-week because I had errands to run after work too many nights. Since I have work meetings in other locations all week and I won't be on the same getting-home schedule as usual, I am going to work on getting in my exercise in the morning. I certainly get up earlier enough for it; now I just need to pull myself away from the internet to do it.

3. Count my points in my Tracker.
I did this for a day or two, and erratically even then. I will get there soon.

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week.
Went out for dinner with cocktails a few too many times this week. I want to eat in more this week, so that issue should be eliminated.

That said, I went down -.4 from my previous week's WW weigh-in (which I am going to start using as my official weigh-ins, not the ones on my home scale), which pleases me. I have been careening up and down the scale 3-4 pounds per week, and it's been too much. A small amount up or down is much more reasonable and realistic.

A related accomplishment occurred yesterday: for my sister's birthday, a bunch of our pals from MF agreed to each run 5K yesterday in honor of her. I was on Week 6/Day 3 of the C25K, so I was supposed to run 25 minutes non-stop. I did, and I am pretty sure I ran the whole 5K distance! I tried to track according to the markings on the path (the town 5K is held there), plus I ran an extra amount while getting to the running path around the lake. I may have shorted the distance a little bit in the end, but I ran for 27 minutes non-stop, and it felt great! I am looking forward now to a) start increasing my endurance and distance, and b) measure the distance I can run more accurately on the indoor track. Whooo, I am a runner! Who knew?

In addition, Hubby and I have been noticing that I am developing muscle definition on my shoulders and upper arms. I will have my Michelle Obama arms yet! (I used to call them Linda Hamilton Terminator arms, but that's so 90s, LOL!)

This week, my main concentrations will be attending meeting and getting in all my exercise and waters. We also ate out a lot this week, and I'd like to rein that in a bit. Amusingly, we ordered a pizza (medium, with spinach and onions -- hey, it's a start) on Wednesday, and "our" regular driver was the one who delivered it. We hadn't seen him in a while, and he was pretty amazed at how much we'd both lost! Hubby replied, "This is what we've been doing since we stopped ordering pizza from you!" Hee.

The Final Push to Goal: the 16 Week Challenge

For those of you just reading this journal for the first time, I've lost 50-60 pounds since January of this year. I say a range because I've been sliding up and down the scale for a couple of months now, losing at peak 60 pounds. I need to lose a total of 65 to be at goal (I started at 225 at Christmas, which was my highest weight).

Losing these last 10 pounds have been tough. I've tried a lot of different mental adjustments and strategies to keep myself committed and on-track: switching from Medifast to Weight Watchers, starting a fairly steady exercise regimen, taking up C25K running, experimenting with kayaking, joining the town pool for swimming laps, putting myself on a short-lived shopping ban, bringing MF bars with me on vacations, etc. Some of these things have turned into new habits -- the new fun exercises in particular -- but still, the scale has gone up more than it is gone down. At peak last week, I was 12 pounds from goal -- and when I ended Medifast, I was 2. Now, I knew I would gain once I left MF, and I was prepared mentally to deal with that. But I thought it would be instantaneous, a quick big jump up as I re-introduced carbs and real food back into my diet. I wasn't prepared for this roller-coaster up and down and up and up.

And I can't really blame WW or eating real food as the problem here: the problem is my inconsistent commitment. Some days I count points, most days I don't. My days of exercise per week range from 0-7. I haven't even attended WW meetings every week!

I need to put the building blocks back in place, and leave them there; let them settle in and become true habits. It's said in WW that people who attend meetings for 16 weeks have the most success; they are the ones who truly commit to the plan and who lose the weight and usually keep it off. And really, it's creating new habits that gives us our weight-loss success, not what we eat; anyone can starve themselves for a week or two and drop a couple of pounds. A successful loser makes deeper changes to their eating habits. That's what I need to do, again. I managed to create new eating habits on six months of Medifast, and they have still kept me in good stead: I eat small meals through the day, I cut out skim milk and too much sweetener in my coffee in the morning, I never miss breakfast, I don't eat nearly as much starch as I used to, I added exercise as a desired and regular part of my life, etc.

Now I need to create more new habits for this phase. For the next 16 weeks, I hereby commit to:

1. Attend WW meetings every week without skipping any. If I cannot make my Saturday 8am meeting, I will make plans to attend the Thursday night one.

2. Exercise 4 days a week minimum. That 5th day is a mental stumbling block for me; if I can't get it in, I get 'all or nothing' in my thinking and I end up doing NO exercise. Four days per week I can do without any mental games.

3. Count my points in my Tracker. I know from vast experience keeping myself accountable is how I lose weight. Plus, I am anal-retentive and I like using the Tracker. It's so cute and organized! There are ticky boxes! I love ticky boxes!

4. Cut back on the alcohol to 1-2 drinks a week. I like my nightly beer on the porch with Hubby too much; I have to remember I like my size 8 skirts better. *grins*

That's it. I will of course keep going on the good habits I have established, and within the confines of the four commitments above I will continue eating good foods and trying to stay on plan as best I can, but really, the goal here is to build the habits. The weight loss will follow; it won't have a choice.

So in a total Bridget Jones move, here are my current weight stats:

Started at: 225
Today's weight: 167.2
Total loss: 57.8
Weekly loss: -4.4 (Water weight. The losses after this won't be this big again.)

++++++

I want to note this observation while I am talking about all of this, as a reminder for keeping myself motivated if I start to flag: for my body, the difference between 160 and 170 pounds is the difference between looking skinny and looking chubby. As my weight has crept back up around 170, I've been shocked and embarrassed at the way it's changed my shape: my belly is round and flabby and isn't easily held in place with a slim skirt, my extra chin reappeared, my hands look puffy, there's a little extra flab of back fat starting to take shape. I've never really noticed how 10 measly pounds alters me before, but I definitely do not like it. I much, MUCH prefer my body at 160; I feel slender at that weight, and I don't have to waste my time dressing to hide parts of my body. Everything just fits as it should.

I know all of the above sounds incredibly narcissistic and self-obsessed, but honestly it is a revelation to me. I've never noticed these changes in such small increments before; the last time I gained (all the) weight back, I knew I was going up, I immediately hated myself and my body, but I just closed my eyes and ignored it and let it happen. Seeing it, making note of it, coming up with a plan to confront it will, I hope, stop that process in its tracks.

My eyes are wide open this time, and they plan on staying that way.

Newsflash: I am 41, not 14

Here's a hard lesson I have learned this weekend: I am not a teenager. I may be in the best shape of my life, and am actually smaller than when I was a teenager, but I do not have the actual body or metabolism of one.

Here are the injuries that I have inflicted on myself while trying to keep up with my 14-year-old niece this weekend:

1. I burned my finger taking oatmeal out of the microwave (okay, this happened the morning before she arrived, but I still have a nasty blister on my middle finger.)
2. I blew out my vocal cords screaming on a roller coaster. I have had no voice for two days now, and so far, it's still not back. I sound like a squeaking frog, much to the amusement of my husband and niece.
3. I think I gave myself a concussion on another roller coaster, which bounced our heads side to side against a not-cushioned-enough padded harness. I have had a minor headache ever since.
4. I fell off a Segway on our awesome tour of downtown Chicago, scraping and bruising my palm, wrist, elbow and hip. Also humiliating myself. But the Segway was still AWESOME, and I will do it again next year when my nephew visits.
5. I gained 4.2 pounds. !!!!!!

She leaves on Monday morning, then I have a crazy busy week at work, then we leave on Saturday for a week-plus in the Tennessee woods with my sister and her family. Much hiking, running, swimming, and other activities will be going on then, and hopefully the eating will be reasonable. We are staying in a house with a full kitchen, and we have to bring all of our own food since there are few-to-no grocery stores nearby, so it should be okay.

Still. I have got to pull it together. The eating is out of control, and it's mostly been dessert/junk, like ice cream and gin-and-tonics and such. I fare better with actual meals, where I am easily able to put together a lot of veggies and lighter choices, but in between, it's been bar the door, Mary!

So the Diet Goals this week are:
1. No more ice cream. If I need an icy treat, it's back to the popsicles, which I love anyway. Or have a WW yogurt -- I am loving the lemons right now!
2. Stick with the 21 points a day.
3. Start to eat down all the fruits and veggies in the fridge before they go bad.

Exercise Goal: I got in 5 days of exercise this week, no problem! Mainly because we were so active and I tried several new things which I am now obsessed with. Today we are either going kayaking again or swimming, or maybe even both. Yay! Then I will get my runs in on M-W-F, and hopefully be able to swim on either Tue or Thur. (C'mon, weather! Work with me!)

Fashion Goal: get all my laundry done so I can pack for the trip. *g* I've got 4 days of meetings this week, so it will be a lot of dresses and skirts. I think I will break out a couple of my NAS purchases, if I can. Oooooh!

I've also got photos to post, but the niece is sleeping in the room with the computer that holds all of them. So maybe I can get to them later today. Otherwise it will wait until Monday!

Weekly Goals: Diet and Exercise

I like Sunday mornings. The day and the week are fresh and new; so much seems possible, and there's room to plan and daydream. Saturdays are for running errands and shopping and activity; Sunday is for taking it a little slower and gearing up for the coming week.

It's strange that I think of it that way, when the reality is I have just as much to do today as I did yesterday; I'm in the middle of doing laundry now (at 6 in the morning!), there's a grocery trip planned for pretty soon, and I've already cleaned out the nasty, nasty litterboxes. Hubby and I are headed out at 11 to go clothes shopping in the western suburbs (once he gets back from fishing), and before then I have to:
-get in a run
-finish the above chores
-prep the veggies from yesterday's farmer's market trip
-play with my tripod and camera timer so I can start taking better daily photos
-complete a clothing challenge from YLF
-write a blog post. (done!)

Then my girlfriend J is coming to visit in the late afternoon/evening, and I'm not sure what exactly we'll be doing, but it will either involve gabbing away while we watch DVDs or gabbing away while on lounge chairs at the pool. Or both. Plus dinner.

Dinner. Gotta plan for that.

My first week of switching to WW has only been so-so. I already detailed some of the bumps I've encountered with the transition, but the biggest problem is that I've been treating this week like my first week being out of school for the summer. You know, when you're so excited about being "free", you stay up so much later than usual watching mindless things on TV you actually have a headache in the morning, you eat so much cereal or popsicles or corn on the cob you make yourself sick, you deliberately stay in bed all day flopping around and playing with your cats, reading and watching TV, ignoring your mother beseeching you to get out of bed and enjoy the day, just because you can? That's been me this week. I've allowed myself to go overboard on everything -- alcohol, ice cream, extravagant dinners, more ice cream *g* -- pretty much every day. All day long I would be meticulous about counting my points and eating filling foods with lots of veggies and variety, and then I would get home and be stupid. Because I could! Sigh.

So this week's Diet Goal is to stick to the WW plan 100% this week. Really commit to it, and try to move the scale in the downward direction. It's been a couple of weeks since that happened, and I'm ready for some success again.

Working along with that, my Exercise Goal is to get in 5 days of exercise. I can't let crappy weather thwart me; if the pool isn't an option, I need to go running or swim at the indoor pool.

I think I also have a Fashion Goal, but I will probably talk about that in a separate post. I haven't quite figured out the format for this blog, but for right now, doing separate blog posts for each topic is working out.

Hey, it's almost 7am. Time to get going on my "lazy Sunday" to-do list! :)