I Hate My Closet, Part 2 (or how I found some better necklines and colors)

In my last post, I bemoaned the limited options for me in plus-size clothing, especially the dreaded fat-girl neckline. (HATE SO MUCH.) My closet was narrowed to black pants, oversized blouses or cascading cardigans, and black sneakers.

I tried to make my peace with it. I really did. I told myself that I was chic for wearing neutrals, that wearing all-black was something millions of women did intentionally, that the colors of the season (blush pink and mint) were unflattering on me anyway.

Then I lost 12 pounds and none of my clothes fit.

Even better, suddenly I could fit into the XXL and XL of the regular stores. I wasn't just limited to the plus-size stores and departments.

The first thing I did was pick up a half-dozen vintage and slub style vee-necks from Old Navy. On sale at 5 bucks a pop, suddenly I had tees to wear at the park. Baby pink, fuschia, teal, peach, striped pinks -- they were bright and fun and perfect for early summer.

Next I tripped over some cute mid-sleeve knit tees at Talbots. I happened to walk through the store after a haircut at the mall a few weeks ago, and sorted through the sale rack. Their regular prices are not in line with the value of the items, in my opinion, but at the sale price I was willing to go for it. The striped top was so adorable I actually wore it out of the store. I grabbed a white boatneck tee in a really soft cotton while I was at it.

(Mine is in a summery-color pattern, blues and pinks and greens.)

Next up I hit Lands End: their knit shorts are my go-to item every summer, and I had the spectrum of sizes that were no good anymore. I got the basic navy, black and brown, of course, and then added white, blue polka-dot and raspberry.

They were having a fantastic sale on their cotton sweaters too, and since the summer has been pretty cool, I snapped a bunch up in blush, purple, coral pink, and a great pink-and-red windowpane pattern. I get so many compliments on that one! Their sweaters are great because they keep their shape and often look sharper than a blazer.

My Kut from the Kloth boyfriend jeans from Nordstrom also made a return appearance, in both the larger and smaller sizes. Thanks to a slew of gift cards and Nordstrom notes, I also just added these in white to my collection too. They'll arrive next week.

Last was a surprise trip back to Old Navy, thanks to a tip from Corporette. There was a great boatneck stretch-cotton top with elbow-length sleeves that just work fantastic as work tops, under jackets or as stand-alones. I got it in black, hot pink, and cream-and-pink stripe.

Such a great relief after all those months of fat-girl neckline!

After all that, I didn't hate my closet anymore. There are fun colors and pieces for casual, and plenty for work too. There's a lot of pink, which is one of my favorite colors and has been missing from my closet for too long. I feel excited when I open up my closet to get ready for work; I've missed that too!

Plus Goodwill got a few bags of clothes, including many of my beloved shoes and sandals. But that's a post for another day. (Spoiler alert: I bought more shoes.) 

It was interesting to shop in a big burst instead of the steady stream of shopping I had done in the past. I liked it -- I made my decisions pretty quickly, and then incorporated it into my wardrobe. Because I hadn't even been browsing sites, everything looked fresh to me -- but I didn't get overwhelmed by choices. I knew the colors and shapes I wanted, and I found them pretty easily. 

Speaking of quick, decisive shopping, I needed a dress to wear for a night downtown yesterday -- we were celebrating a friend's birthday and my cousin's first trip to Chicago, so we did a nice dinner at an Italian tapas place, and then we watched a fireworks display on a night cruise out on Lake Michigan. I stopped at Target for some other groceries, and found the cutest sleeveless striped fit-and-flare dress (with pockets!) on the clearance rack. $19 bucks later, I had a new dress!

P.S. We had a fabulous time watching the fireworks. If you are ever in Chicago on a Saturday night in the summer, I highly recommend you go. It's magical.

Everything on is new within the last six months: Lands End purple cardigan, blue floral necklace from J Crew Outlet, black-patterned canvas wristlet from LOFT, tangerine Fitbit. :)

P.P.S I got a new hat too!

How I killed my impulse shopping habit

A remarkable thing has happened to me the last few months: after five years of impulse shopping, spending hundreds of dollars and hours at the mall or in online stores every month, I finally broke myself of the habit.

When I say I shopped, I mean I really shopped. I thought nothing of going up to the outlet mall for the day, one weekend a month, and coming home with multiple bags. I had a routine online, where I would hit 3-4 of my favorite stores, fill up the shopping carts, then as the best sale email popped up for each I would hit Checkout. Of course, I also ended up returning a lot, but that just gave me another excuse to go to the store.

Even if I wasn't buying, I was always shopping.

I could give you tons of excuses for it -- I had significant weight losses and gains, I discovered fashion very late in life, I got wrapped up in following and being a fashion blogger and trying to keep my closet fresh -- but all of those are just excuses. The truth is I liked having new clothes, and lots of them.

Killing that habit has been a 4-step process.

1. I read Overdressed: the Shockingly High Cost of Cheap Fashion. My reader Roberta recommended it months ago, and I have been recommending it to all my fashion-minded friends both on and offline ever since. The book does a tremendous job detailing the impact our shopping habits have had on our style, our economy, our charities, the international economy, the workers, and then environment. The chapter on what really happens to most of the clothes we donate was enough for me to re-evaluate what the hell I was doing.



2. I cleaned out my closet. And by closet I mean I cleaned out everything, right down to every obscure corner where I was essentially "hiding" clothes: in drawers, on hangers, under the bed, in bureaus in the hall, in closets in the office, in many, many places in the basement. I had an unnecessary amount of clothes, so much so it was preventing my ability to SEE what I had. I have always used my outfits as a creative outlet, mixing together colors, patterns and just the right accessories to finish it off. Now I can do that much more easily because everything is right in front of me every day, and I don't feel like I am "missing" things for outfits...which of course means I don't need to shop as much.




3. I began tracking my purchases and edits on a monthly basis. I did one final massive drop-off at the donation center when I cleaned out my closet, but that is the last time I intend to do that. The quantity of what I gave away was ridiculous, and not in a good way. That said, things do need to get culled regularly, and it's equally important that I track my purchases. It helps me see my buying patterns, and more than that it helps me see when I am buying things that don't make it more than a month or two. I already have a few items I bought in September and October that I want to get rid of already; I need to get smarter about that.

Once those pieces were in place, that solved many of the utilitarian, practical problems that impulse shopping had created. But what the first three steps didn't give me was the excitement and fun that I got with new clothes: that first thrill of trying on a new piece and see how it flatters me, the creative buzz as I figure out what I can pair it with in new outfits, the compliments I got from other fashion-minded friends.

That only came with the last step of the process.



4. I joined Gwynnie Bee. I've talked about my love for this company many times in the past, but they've earned it. I love everything about them: the website is easy to navigate, the photos of the clothes are flattering and often show the same item on different models so you can see differences in fit and drape on various body types, and adding items to your "closet" is a snap. They've improved their shipping times since I started in September, and will be improving them again once they move to a new distribution center. But for now you can indicate on the website when you are shipping something back, and they will send your next piece out sooner.

Best of all, I get all of the fun of new purchases without having to buy anything. The white box arrives every couple of days, and inside is a lovely piece gently folded and wrapped in tissue. Sometimes I don't check the website before so it's a surprise when I open the box, other times I take a peek so I can start planning how I will fit it into my closet before it gets here. Once I've tried it on and determined it is the right size (which I am getting better at ordering now that I am more familiar with some of their brands) the creativity starts as I dream up new outfits for it. And if the item didn't fit, I fold it immediately into the return bag, go to the website that evening to note I am shipping it back and wave it goodbye, just like I would do with any returns from my impulse shopping days.

Some of the pieces I have gotten lately (more are here):



(My hair was still soaking wet so I just did a quick half self-portrait.) This Rafaella long sweater was unexpected and fun; the cowl was a knit weave, but the sweater was more like a terry sweatshirt. It felt great and perfect for a chilly winter day.



This Edista top is still one of my favorites, ever.





Like I said, I didn't a good picture of myself in this Eloquii sequin jacket, but it was a really flattering fit and good quality.





This Karen Kane orange drape neck top proved to add a nice punch of color to a couple of business meeting outfits.





This brown animal print jacket is hard to photograph so you can see all the detailing, but it has great quilted ruching on the side so it is not nearly as boxy as the top photo suggests. I really liked the orange with it; the brown and black have a dusty, muted tone to them so it's difficult to find the right blouse for the jacket.



I got in one more wear of the orange top in a casual outfit, with a long chunky grey sweater, silver circle pendant from LOFT Outlet, faded Kut from the Kloth boyfriend jeans, and my faux-moto Clarks boots.



I showed off this JonesNY snakeprint cardigan in my Color Project: White post, but it also got a few more wears with other colors for some work outfits too.



The all-black palette brought out more of the baseball jacket look of the sweater, I thought. And hey Mom -- that's the badge pendant necklace from Brighton that you got for me! :)



Last outfit was with my own red Lane Bryant drape top -- which you will see again as part of the Color Project: Red round-up. :)

Gwynnie Bee approached me last week to become an affiliate, and I very happily said yes. Long-time blog readers will know that I don't really do blog sponsorships; I get email inquiries occasionally asking me to review products, but nothing has ever interested me the way Gwynnie Bee has. So I guess this is my first official blog entry that will need a disclaimer!

If you are interested in signing up for Gwynnie Bee, click this link to join. Joining is free -- it lets you look around the site and view some of the clothes they offer. If you decide to subscribe to the 1, 2, or 3 plan, they are currently offering a 30-day free trial, and after that they will charge your credit card for whichever monthly rate you choose. Here comes the disclaimer part: as an affiliate, I will get a free month myself if you follow the link to join and end up as a paying subscriber.

I am going to be blunt here: if you are a plus-sized woman who likes clothes, you are foolish not to try this out. I've been a big girl all my adult life, and I have never, EVER had a site where I could see -- and more importantly, get to feel and wear -- so many different brands and styles together in one place. It's like a whole mall, just for us!

They have TONS of dressy outfits too; my plan when I have a nice party to go to is to rearrange the closet and hold sections so I will get sent a good assortment of dresses and sparkly tops and jackets to try and to borrow for the occasion. I can't even think of another site where that is possible for someone my size.

When I eventually start to lose weight again, I suspect they are going to be a godsend for that as well; I will just order smaller sizes as I move down the scale, thus rotating through a new wardrobe without having to buy a whole new wardrobe.

Most of all,  Gwynnie Bee makes me feel PRETTY, and WELCOMED, and VALUED, as a woman and as a customer. I never feel left out because I want to wear something that isn't offered in my size (thanks a lot, Banana and Gap), I don't feel pushed aside and sent to the Misses section behind the luggage on a different floor than everyone else (hello, Macys) and the online photos they choose are pretty and flattering and don't make their models look like squat dwarves in highwaters (that's you, Nordstrom). I do shop at all the stores I just complained about, of course, but it's always while feeling like a little bit *less* than their preferred customer. Gwynnie Bee never makes me feel like that.

Seriously, give them a try. They were definitely the final piece I needed in place to kill my impulse shopping habit. :)

Now, don't get me wrong: I still love shopping! In fact, my next post will be about Stuff I Want. But the need to do it as often as I used to, or at the same volume of purchases, that's dead and gone. I don't miss it.

If only it were this easy to give up some of my other bad habits! :)

The Color Project: White

One of the OCD things about my closet is that I have each item category (sweaters, tops, jackets, pants) sorted by color. When I am looking for a black top, for instance, they are all together so I can see my options. Now that my closet is so lean, I even hung all the t-shirts so they can be included in that grouping.

One day as I was grabbing a favorite white top, I started to wonder if I really wore ALL of the tops that were in each of the color categories. Or was it just a favorite 1-2 that got cycled through and the rest were there as filler?

So I embarked on what I am calling the Color Project. I pulled all the white tops to the front of my closet and purposefully worked as many as I could into my outfit rotation. I did not put a time limit on it -- i.e., wear them all in a week -- because this wasn't some fashion challenge I was forcing on myself; the idea was to see if I really did NEED to have all the ones I had, or if a few could be edited.

Turns out, I wore them all. I didn't love them all, but I did wear them. Since none were obvious edits, I've had to look a little deeper to see which are worth keeping.

1. V-neck ruched Sejour long-sleeve, Nordstrom. Worn with a navy polka-dot scarf from Old Navy, navy Gap modern bootcuts, grey long-sleeved Target Merona cardigan, and grey Franco Sarto Deers. My co-worker told me I looked like the definition of Connecticut preppy, which I consider a compliment. :)
I took these particular Deers to the cobbler and had him replace the heel tips, which just extended the life of these shoes by another 2-3 years for sure.  You know how I love all my versions of these shoes, so I am thrilled.



Verdict: The shirt itself is okay; the v-neck sits a little crooked on me, and I keep thinking that is more versatile than it is. There's a bit of a flare to it at the waist that I don't love. I'm not ready to let it go quite yet, but it was tougher to rotate in than some of my others. 

2. Old Navy collared knit button-down shirt, first under a new cream Old Navy waffle-knit pullover. It was a snowy day, so bundling up was key. The Gap straight-legs were the only option as pants because I had to tuck them into my Dansko snow boots. I thought the blue bubble necklace added the right amount of dressiness to tip the outfit into the business casual/office appropriate look. Not what I would wear if I had been at one of the hospitals, but for just my office it worked.



I wore it again this weekend under my new striped cotton pullover from Gap, Dreamer Old Navy jeans, pewter Privos and the clear acrylic ice cube pendant from Banana Republic. Even Hubby thought this was a cute look.



Verdict: This one is a total keeper. I was avoiding wearing it because it was too wrinkled and I was too lazy to iron it, but I found that it can either go under my new pullover sweaters or a few hard shakes will eliminate the worst of the wrinkles.

3. Lauren Conrad embellished tee, Kohls. I have had this for at least 3 years, but it still works with so many looks. I posted the first outfit below back in January; my plan was to wear all the white shirts over the month and see if anyone noticed, then do a round-up post. Those plans got waylaid when I stopped posting. ;-D



I wore it again this weekend with the mushroom knit cardigan, faded Dreamer jeans, and a color-blocked infinity scarf I got last spring from Old Navy; it is navy, olive green and mint/paleblue, which I am seeing around as a pretty trendy color these days. So I dug my only version of it out. :)






Verdict: this veteran still has plenty of life in her. She's going nowhere.

4. Basic long-sleeved LOFT tee, worn under a Forth & Towne faux-wrap cardigan. I posted about this outfit before too.



Verdict: I completely forgot I wore or even owned this until I found the picture on Flickr. That does not speak well for its longevity or necessity in my closet. I think I only need one long-sleeved white top, so I will probably keep either this or the v-neck.

5. This slub tee from Lane Bryant I actually pulled out of my loungewear drawer and rotated back into regular wear. It has two tiny stain dots on the front that had relegated it to loungewear, but I managed to cover those up and finally understood the power of a great plain white t-shirt.
I wish I had gotten a good front-on shot of this outfit, which was all my co-worker's idea. This was a gorgeous tux-like jacket from Gwynnie Bee with sequined sleeves, and I went for a rocker look with an assortment of long silver necklaces. Really fun look that I will probably repeat with some other dressy jackets I have.



A-ha! I did wear the slub tee again, this time with a fabulous snakeskin print cardigan from Gwynnie Bee. I loved that sweater so much I wore it four times before I sadly returned it. This time I added my Bestey Johnson camera pendant necklace, faded Gap Dreamer jeans, and patent tan-black colorblocked flats from Me Too.





Verdict: the perfect white t-shirt. Will try to find a replacement at Lane Bryant, or will figure out how to get those two stain dots out. (Thanks for the tips in the last post, gals; I will try those with this!)

6. LOFT ruched neck sleeveless tee. Probably my least-favorite of all my white tops, especially now that I have found the perfect one above. This is with my new-ish mushroom Ann Taylor Outlet knit cardigan, new black Gap long-and-lean jeans, and my trusty pewter lasso necklace from Banana Republic (which I bought with Shopping Friend a million years ago). 

I forgot how awful mirror shots were; so glad I got my office corner back for my tripod!



Verdict: it's okay, but the Lane Bryant one is better. Might be hitting the road soon.

7. This LOFT tee has angled distressed stripes, which offer interesting texture to a basic ivory tee. Paired with the Betsey Johnson camera pendant again, my fuschia Gap piped shrunken blazer, grey pinstriped Gap modern bootcuts, and black Clark Artisan boots.



I wore this top again the following weekend, this time pairing with a couple of familiar items, the mushroom knit cardigan from above, and the same faded Dreamer jeans. The jewelry this time was an assortment of long gold necklaces (boy I liked that look with the sparkly jacket), and a pair of faux-suede tan boots from Target.





Verdict: like the cream embellished one in #3, this is going nowhere for a long time.

8. The last top of the White Color Project was a regular button-down, a no-iron three-quarter sleeve Foxcroft version from Nordstrom. I've had this in my closet for at least a year, and I think I wore it one time. It is the reason I actually embarked on this experiment at all -- I didn't think I would like it when I tried to incorporate it into outfits, and then I could finally edit it out without guilt. 



But here's the funny thing: turns out I LOVED IT. The fit is perfect, there is no gapping at the chest, it tucks in without too much extra fabric bulking up under my pants, and the no-iron claim really means no ironing needed. Best of all, I had forgotten how much I like a good collared neckline; one of the most annoying parts about being fat is the enormous scoop neckline that are on nearly every top. Easily 75% of all plus-sized tops are like this, especially the nicer ones from Nordstrom. (Skim this page to see what I mean.) I learned from this round of the Color Project that I really miss a variety of necklines, and having that variety among my current white tops made this rather enjoyable.

Verdict: not only keeping it, but probably buying another in a different color.

++++++

Final thoughts of this Color Project round:
1. A variety of necklines is important to me, which I will keep in mind as I shop in the future. (Note to self: add turtleneck to your list for next winter.)
2. I love the look of a plain tee, funky jacket and a bunch of necklaces for dressy going-out occasions.
3. I had forgotten how much I love a good button-down.
4. Keeping: cream embellished #3, ivory distressed stripes #7, knit collared button-down #2 and no-iron button-down #8, and the perfect plain white t-shirt #5.
5. On the fence: one of the two long-sleeved tees (#1 and #4), the ruched sleeveless tee #6. 
6. While I don't mind repeating outfits, it did get boring for a stretch, I think because I was just tired of white.  But since I usually rotate colors more often than I did here, this was likely a product of the Project itself than an issue with any of the tops.

Next round is red (pinks and purples are included in that section of my closet too). I've already started!




What do you guys think? Any tops I should reconsider keeping?

Random December outfits

A few random outfits I have been wearing lately:



Grey on grey on grey on black. I am crazy about all the draped necklines around these days; this one is a heathered grey sleeveless one from Target that has worked well under many of my blazers. The drape at the waist is a problem, though. I put this grey mix together because I wanted to wear my grey pinstriped pants but there is something about the hue that makes it hard to fit with my more brightly-colored tops. So I went with neutrals instead. The jacket is a knit Alice + Olivia that I got during the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale; for a while there I had my doubts it would get much wear but I've been putting an effort into finding the right use for it, and it's worked well. 



More neutrals of the navy and brown school.  The grandpa cardigan is a little too grandpa-y here, but I decided to give it some structure by tucking in my Gap navy-and-brown striped top and adding a brown belt. Now that I look at it, a stronger gold necklace would have worked better instead the delicate long one I wore.



Casual Friday with a mustard v-neck shirt from Nordstrom, my beloved striped Lands End blazer, the Gap trouser jeans, and rose gold Tahari flats from DSW.

We went to Detroit this weekend (photos coming tomorrow!) and I somehow only managed to get one outfit photo. Which is a bummer, because I did finally break down and bought some new clothes from Lane Bryant, all of which I wore -- and that went together perfectly -- all weekend. I was so excited about my weekend packing, and I have no visual evidence to show it off. Doh!



This was Friday night; we stayed at the MGM Grand casino, so we spent the night "in" and downstairs gambling and hanging out. The long cardigan and black top are new from Lane Bryant, the jeans are those Jag jeans that I am still on the fence about (they did not fare well by the end of the weekend, waaaaaay too stretched out) and my sparkly Vince Camute suede flats. I am in love with the weight, fabric and stripe size on that cardigan; it is going into heavy rotation this winter, I can tell you now. Probably going to wear it today!



The purse is from a consignment store from a couple of years ago; it's a faux Chanel that I paid about $15 for. I love the idea of it, but I have only used 2-3 times. This is the last one; the "leather" in the strap is completely shredding and left little red pieces everywhere. It's in the bag for donation now!



This is yesterday's back-to-work outfit: the top is from Gwynnie Bee, and I knew as soon as I saw it on their website I had to wear it with my cobalt blue blazer. On its own, I didn't really love the top; the knit was too static-y and too short for my preferences, but under the jacket? Perfect.



I am so enjoying my Gwynnie Bee experience, I am considering upping my subscription to 3-pieces out a a time. Hmm, maybe for the new year when the shopping itch starts up anew. Right now I think I am doing okay finding things to wear. :)