Wardrobe Basics: What Every Woman Needs to Look Polished

That was me about 10 years ago. Quite the fashion plate, no?

No.

I'm okay with admitting it, because my journey to appreciating fashion and the value in looking and feeling attractive has been one of the most rewarding journeys I've been on. I never understood style or fashion growing up, and instead of trying to learn about it I put my nose in the air. "I don't need to do my hair or wear pretty clothes," I thought. "I'm smart and people like me for my brains, not my looks."

Boy, was I dumb.

I've told this story before, but it wasn't until I worked at Forth & Towne and met Shopping Friend that I finally started putting things together. She nudged me into buying clothes that fit properly and flattered me, convinced me to try a heeled shoe for the first time in my life (a kitten heel, which was all I could manage LOL), and showed me by example that having good shoes, purses and regular hair maintenance made a huge difference. Four (five?) years later, and now she sometimes asks my advice. :) Just sometimes -- she still teaches me a lot every time I see her.

What I have learned is that if you want to look polished, you have to have the basics. Not the "Top 10 Pieces Every Woman Should Own" kind of list, but the basic, critical areas you MUST pay attention to in some way if you want to look put together.

It's funny, I started thinking about this topic because I was feeling out of sorts lately, and I couldn't put my finger on why. I was looking at my photos of my awesome new dress, and it bothered me that I didn't like the photos at all. Then it dawned on me that I was ruining the look because I had let some of the basics slide.

So here are my Ironclad, Can't-Do-Without Rules to Looking Polished:

1. A good haircut, correctly styled.
It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be cut frequently, and you must style it. If you airdry it and/or stick it in a ponytail every day, it's time to re-think your cut. For me, when I start using barrettes every day I know I am overdue. I have been overdue all month, and it showed.
I went in for a cut on Saturday, and I asked her to change it up. The straight look is too hard to maintain in the summer, and while my hair has been a disaster for weeks I still liked the idea of a flippy, casual look that I had been trying and failing to go for. So she cut it so it will flip, and she showed me how to tousle blowdry it. Now I will still have an easy, casual look, but it's much more polished and attractive.

See?

Before:


After:


Makes a big difference.

2. Makeup.
God, I hated makeup for forever. It was just too...complicated. Girly. Mysterious. it took too long in the morning. I never recognized myself when I had it on. Et cetera.
Finally, FINALLY, at the Laura Mercier counter the day of the ball (just this March!), the woman showed me how to put on eye makeup that made my eyes pop but wasn't overdone, and it just clicked. Now I put it on every day without grumbling, and I finally like the way it looks. I still need to master the foundation/concealer thing, but at least my eyes look good!
Now, when I look at myself without makeup, I see what other people were seeing; I wasn't being rebellious or cool by going natural, I just looked messy, bland and unfinished. Makeup -- even just eyeliner, mascara, and blush -- makes me look polished and professional. And as I get older, it gets more important. Trust me on that.

3. Wear a professionally-fitted bra.
I have said it before and I will say it again: treat your girls well. Get fitted at least once a year (more if you are changing sizes), and buy a good bra. It will pay for itself, I promise you.
I forgot this but Thursday's outfit brought that lesson home again: I didn't like the way the dress fit because my bra was all sprung out and curling at the top so it poked through the dress fabric. One stop at Nordstrom yesterday and voila, problem solved! My dresses and tops will lay flat again.

4. Wear comfortable, functional, PRETTY shoes.
You can get shoes that fill all three requirements, but it will rarely be at Target or Payless. And all three requirements matter, in equal measure; you need comfortable so you don't damage your feet or knees and so you can walk in them, you need functional so they can work with your wardrobe, and you need pretty so you look polished.
For many years I owned three pairs of shoes total, and I was proud of it. One of those were the white sneakers in the photo above -- so clearly I was missing out on "functional" and "pretty". Now I probably have way too many, and I still make mistakes from time to time in buying ones I end up not wearing, but it is possible to have a small collection of shoes that still give you a finished look. If you wear dresses, you need a nude sandal (flat or wedge heel is okay) for summer, and a different heel or flat for fall and winter. If you wear pants, you can get either a ballet flat or a heel, but pick one and make sure all your pant lengths fit with it. Pants are usually blacks or greys, so get something with color that goes with your tops. Red is usually a winner. Just make sure you fill the three requirements: comfortable, functional, pretty. They can be inexpensive, but they can't be cheap.

5. Own a grownup purse.
I was spoiled rotten by Shopping Friend's stint with Coach, and now I have a very nice collection of expensive purses. But I didn't have to pay that to acquire my grownup purse collection; I chose to do it that way. There are tons of other less-expensive options that will still help you look pulled together.
Backpacks, Hello Kitty anything, mis-proportionate, out-of-season, and/or cheap purses are not polished. But you can go with pretty much any other style you like, and any color, just as long as it goes with the rest of your outfit. Because I wear colors in my outfits, I tend to stick with neutral color purses, but if you are a neutral fan consider a blue, red, yellow or green purse.
Having the right weight and color for the season is probably the one purse rule I haven't quite mastered yet; for me, I can't quite find the right one for summer. Hopefully my search is over; I just placed my order for one today. (Thanks for the idea, Sarah!) But in the interim, I have been using a bright blue shoulder bag from Old Navy ($18) and a chestnut tote from Gap ($35), and truthfully they work just fine. I just really want a white bag, and let's face it, I am still purse-spoiled. :)

6. Accessorize.
Be it a scarf, necklace, earrings, bracelets, pins, belt, whatever, you need to finish off the outfit. A scarf will make even a t-shirt and jeans look more dressed up. I tend to wear bracelets in the summer because it is too hot to have anything on my neck.


This was what I wore with a black t-shirt and faded jeans on the airplane two weeks ago. Easy and put together.

Experiment and see what you like; maybe you're a scarf person, or you like rings. It doesn't have to cost much either. Thrift and consignment stores are a good place to start, as is Target.

7. Your clothes should FIT.
I have also said this a million times: you need to dress for your size, no matter what that size is. If your pants are too tight, or worse, when they are so baggy it looks like you are wearing diapers, that is not polished. Buy ones in your size, or better if you are moving up or down the scale, pick up a handful of dresses from Target or Kohls; dresses are far more forgiving for 10-20 pounds in either direction. Why do you think I love them so? :)

8. Do your nails.
Either at home or at a nail salon, but you need to keep your nails neat and attractive. Either with polish or just buffed is fine, and up to you. If you wear open-toed shoes, I strongly recommend regular pedicures; some people have hangups about the length of their toes, but as I was saying to Bella yesterday, if you wear polish on your toes people don't notice anything else. They see the color and the shoe, and the rest of your "ugly" foot gets passed by. :)
I bit my nails for years, and my hands always looked awful, like a nervous teenager. But I thought manicures were only for people with long, pretty nails so I never did them. One day as I was getting a pedicure (also from encouragement from Shopping Friend) the nail tech convinced me to get a mani too. Even though my nails were stubby, she smoothed them out and put a pale pink polish on, and I was hooked. My nails are still short, but I rarely bite them anymore, and again, it finishes off my look.


(Example of my shoe and my nails rule.)


Those are all the rules. Not so hard, really.

Do you follow these? Which ones do you struggle with?

(As a side note, both Sally at Already Pretty and Angie at You Look Fab posted on the same topic within the last few weeks. Be sure to check out their wise thoughts too!)